Full Circle

As I was laying in my bed early this morning, I started thinking about my youngest son and myself. Joshua is 20 years old and has become a person I sometimes don't recognize anymore. It started me thinking of myself when I was young.I'll admit it, I gave my mother a run for her money, my quest was to be the worst daughter ever. I smoked, drank, stole, slept around and lied about it all. I hung out with the dregs of Society and even brought them home, I was a mess. Of course, my mom issued me the standard line that has rung true, "One day you will have a child that is just like you". 20 years ago I had Josh. Even though he has not necessarily run with the dregs of Society and he abhors drinking and smoking, he has given me a run for my money. How, you ask? By being one of the most selfish people I know. Of course, we know our kids (not all, but some) have a tendency, in this day and age, to feel a sense of entitlement. What with everything being handed to them on a silver platter, such as computers, Ipods, cell phones and the like, children nowadays have undergone somewhat of a metamorphosis as far as knowing what it feels like to want. My son has a job, but he thinks we are mean to ask him to pay towards the bills because he needs to save for a car. Not the 2001 Ford Taurus that I worked hard to pay for that needs minimal work on it, but the car of his dreams. Why should we ask him to pitch in around the house, taking out trash and washing dishes is for amateurs. When he buys sodas and puts some in the refrigerator, how dare his mother drink one without his permission. Why should he be cordial to his own brother, it's a dog eat dog world out there. Besides, this world revolves around Josh, not Troy. As I watch this person that I raised become this person I don't know, I can't help but to think how things have come full circle for me. I can remember the look of worry on my mothers face as I strolled into the house way past curfew, not a care in the world. I can remember not sharing things with my brother Eric, even though he would readily share with me. I can remember how, as a single parent, my mom worked hard for the things that I had and I was totally ungrateful. Boy, how things have changed for me. Now I understand what it means to feel as though all my sacrifice has been for naught. I understand what it means to feel as though this person I gave birth to will never truly understand what it feels like to be humble. And all I can say is this, "One day, he will have a child that will be just like him".